The initial plan was to write something with a little arte, like maybe start with a scene description from Noah Baumbach’s Frances Ha, maybe include a dialog or two, and then fluidly transition into a persuasive thesis statement on adulthood, credit scores, and being “undateable.” Too bad I’m too lazy to pull that off, so I’m just gonna go ahead and say,
Hey, guys — it’s gonna be May! (N*SYNC, anyone?)
Continue reading “April”
Sunday night I catch myself watching The Office while nibbling on Skittles and downing the decadent beads of sugar with tepid green tea. I am moving to a new city tomorrow yet here I am doing nothing, just bumming around like some chubby Norse god who lost his will to be.
But you really have to start packing, I remind myself. My new place — a tiny room in the basement of an old house along a quiet, tree-lined street — is ready for occupancy tomorrow. The landlady and I have already agreed on a move-in time. Everything is set, actually, except for my luggage that remains empty.
Continue reading “Sunday Dress”
When I started Jumping Jolens back in 2012, search terms on Google were unencrypted. I could read every keyword that lured random strangers into the stinky pits of my blog. It was pretty cool, but I didn’t gain much from it save for the occasional entertainment.
Some search terms were funny (“kailan tutubo pag nag ahit ng kilay”), some were lewd (“hugis ng vagina ni [celebrity]”), and some were legitimate queries (“ano ang spaghetting pataas at pababa”). Today I will try to answer some of these questions and address other pressing concerns, all in the spirit of Ayokong Asikasuhin ang Buhay Ko Kaya Ito na Muna ang Gagawin Ko.
Continue reading “Searching”
I watched six movies this month. Five out of six were romance films; the odd one out was Captain Marvel.
I didn’t write notes about these movies. I didn’t even think about them that much. I needed to rest my mind; I had enough shit to worry about this month.
When I watched Alone/Together I cried practically the entire time. I didn’t, no — I couldn’t think too much about the film. I don’t even remember anything about it; I just know that the tears started pouring the moment I saw CAL.
Continue reading “March”
So believe it or not (believe it), I wasn’t always a self-deprecating dumb-ass who barely got through her acads. At one point in my origin story, I was actually pretty smart. Book-smart, math-smart — that brand of smart.
Unfortunately I peaked in grade school. Back then my marks were high enough to land me a spot in the Honor List even though all I ever did was show up. I never studied at home and I watched a lot of TV. The only time I truly cared was when we had to grow a plant for Science and I treasured my munggo seed like it was a mother’s most precious orchid. (I used to love botany, remember?)
One of my teachers then was Ma’am Tessie, a plump bespectacled guráng who put on smeared lipstick like an impish Bratz doll. Spoiler alert: Ma’am Tessie hated my guts.
Continue reading “Bitchy Ma’am Tessie”
A couple years back I wrote a draft for a post called “If Fonts Were People.” I wanted to personify the fonts that I use, but the task turned out to be a little too ambitious for my skills. Here’s a snippet:
It’s the font. My productivity relies heavily on pretty fonts.
Cochin has been my go-to recently. Cochin is pretty and petite, like a quiet chinita with perfect posture and who clips her bangs to the side. She dresses sharply like she’s always en route to a corporate meeting. And if you say the right things, you will see the stern sweetness in her smile. That’s what I long for when I write: I want the words to smile.
I searched Google for “get to know you questions” and I found this. La la la, whatever.
What type of music are you into?
The last song I saved on Spotify was “Before We Begin” by Broadcast. (That doesn’t really answer the question, does it?)
What are your hobbies and how did you get into them?
I got into blogging because I genuinely enjoyed writing in high school. I got into painting/sketching because I was living out of town a couple years back and I was sooo bored. That’s when I sketched this Paraluman portrait and I thought, uy, masaya ‘to a!
Continue reading “Sunday Questions”
