Sunday Currently #5

It is almost 2am on a Monday and I have just completed all my tasks for Sunday but I still feel like writing a post before I finally, finally go to sleep — so currently I am

reading Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata, which I would probably finish tonight (this morning) while I wait for Sleep to kick in;

writing this post and a bazillion other things for school and for work;

listening to my “Panggabi” playlist;

thinking that I am too tired to think about anything right at this moment;

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Of places and parallel universes

Between moments of wakefulness and sleep, a realization: my dreams rarely take place in Canada. Take place. Isn’t that a nice phrase? To take place. As if places are ever ours to take.

A couple nights ago my dream took place in an unfamiliar, unnamed location. In the dream I was speaking gibberish while explaining electric field equations to Another Person. I could very well be telling a story about norval swords and slithy toves, but within the (il)logical parameters of my dream, I perfectly understood Gaussian math.

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September (Hear Me Speak)

I am copping out on my September log. I have a bazillion things to do, and I just don’t have the energy nor the time to think and write about my life. Nakakapagod!

In lieu of a September post I have an audio recording of my August log. Yez baks, that’s right. I talked to Yin of Kaharuhay the other day and she mentioned that I could start a podcast by just reading my blog posts aloud. E uto-uto naman ako, plus I really needed a quick sanity break, so here we are:

[sorry I had to remove it]

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Sunday Night Worries

I have a presentation to do tomorrow and it’s about the technical report that I submitted last week.

My supervisor has yet to give me feedback on what I wrote, but I am 100% certain that half of it is hard, solid bullshit. I simply didn’t understand what I was writing about. And tomorrow, when I present that shit in front of the team, I know that they will realize how I practically know nothing about the topic. Hayayay.

A part of me just wants to chill and focus on what’s present. Be objective, they say. Address the things you can change and forget the stuff that you have no control over. Understand the facts and start from there.

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Hulyo

Bago ako magsimulang kumuda tungkol sa buwan ng Hulyo, ikukuwento ko muna na kanina, araw ng Linggo, bandang alas siete ng umaga, nagdilim ang paningin ko at nawalan ako ng malay. Gutom na gutom kasi ako.

N’ung Biernes pa ‘yung huling kain ko, pananghalian na shawarma mula sa isang restaurant malapit sa opisina. Biernes ng gabi dumaan lang ako sa mall at bumili ng ice cream (isang cup ng white chocolate with raspberry!). Kahapon naman, Sabado, nagkape lang ako buong araw. Balak ko naman talagang mag-almusal kaninang umaga, pero ‘ayun na nga, hinimatay ako. Nang magising ako sa sahig ng kusina kung saan ako bumagsak, kumain agad ako ng tsokolate at pumasok sa kwarto para humiga at magpahinga. Hayayay.

Pero ayos naman na ako ngayon. Namalengke na ako kanina, okay na. Susubukan ko na lang siguro na hindi magpagutom ulit. Hmm.

So mabalik tayo sa Hulyo. Ano nga ba ang nangyari n’ung Hulyo?

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All Nighter

I just submitted two write-ups for a part-time job and I still have a technical report for another job that I need to finish tonight. It seems like I will be handing my boss a 20-page shitfest tomorrow, but, to be honest, I don’t really care about it anymore. I am ready to take a big L on this one, and I will just go ahead and move forward with a lesson or two. Que sera sera, Jolens. Life goes on.

All these technical write-ups that I’ve been pulling out my ass have made me realize how badly I enjoy casual essay writing. Casual, which basically refers to the kind of writing most bloggers do. Casual, like it’s just me speaking to all of you.

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